“Still Believe”

They say I’m fake ‘cause I fight temptation

Like faith only counts if you’ve mastered salvation

But they don’t see the war inside my mind

Where angels scream and demons lie

I’ve stared down shame in a bloodstained mirror

Cried out to God when He felt nowhere near

But even when I choke in the silence and noise…

I still whisper truth with a broken voice

I still believe — even when I fall

Even when I’m bound, chained to it all

I still believe — when the night won’t end

When I break my vows and fail again

I’m not holy, but I’m His

In the storm and in the abyss

You can doubt me, hate me, leave

But through it all — I still believe

I’ve got scars I won’t show in the light

And habits that drag me into the night

I pray and relapse, rinse and repeat

Sometimes I’m on fire, sometimes in defeat

They preach perfection from padded pews

But never talk about the days you lose

And I’m tired of pretending to be clean

When I’m knee-deep in what I’ve seen

I still believe — with a shattered soul

Even if I never feel whole

I still believe — through every lie

Every time I curse the sky

I’m not worthy, but I’m known

In the filth, I’m not alone

My God sees past what you perceive

Say what you want — I still believe

I’m not your perfect poster child

I’m battle-worn, un-reconciled

But faith ain’t clean — it’s blood and dust

It’s wrestling angels ‘cause I must

(Scream)

I break! I bend! I crawl! I cry!

But I never let my faith just die!

I still believe — in the middle of war

When I’m flat on my face on the floor

I still believe — though I lose the fight

Grace hits harder than guilt at night

I’m not done. I’m not through.

I’m not clean, but I’m true.

So doubt me, shame me, leave…

But through the fire — I still believe

Even in chains… even in flames…

I still believe in Your name…