Destroy My Demon (Don’t Let Me Go)

It’s an uphill battle

Dark thoughts keep circlin’ my head

I’m still here though…

Yeah

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It’s an uphill battle, I pedal backwards through the rain

Victim mentality, I hate it but it’s chained to my brain

When the waves come crashin’, I bounce back, that’s the claim

But I’ve never been this low, if I painted my soul it’s stained

They say happiness is choice

Guess I chose to fall flat

Tryna block out all the noise

But my mind’s always off track

Gotta bleed just so I write

Tryna be someone I’d like

If I don’t act quick, I lose my grip

No contentment in my life

Pressure cookin’ as an artist, critics watchin’ every move

Sorry if I’m distant lately, I’ve just been in a mood

Lay in bed starin’ ceilings, overthinkin’ every step

Should be livin’ in the moment

No wonder I’m a mess

I resist the help I need

Turn my people into ghosts

Where’s my balance? How’d I lose it?

Why’s my life feel like a joke?

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Why can’t I let go?

It’s killin’ me so silently

Been numb way too long

Can’t escape the negativity

Do I deserve love?

Or is that just a fantasy?

Promised you I’d change

Swear there’s somethin’ wrong with me

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I just wanna drink and forget my name

Tryna feel alive, tryna numb the pain

I feel lonely even in a crowded room

Smile on my face but I’m barely movin’

I don’t wanna feel this weight no more

Every night feels like a war

I’m not sayin’ I’m done, I’m just tired, okay?

I’m fightin’ my demons, don’t let me fade

⸻

I can’t stand myself when I’m sober

So I chase a feeling just to feel awake

Say I wanna grow but I’m stuck in closure

Every promise that I make still breaks

Tryna love myself, it backfires

Every mirror feels like a threat

I don’t even know who I am now

Just know I ain’t done yet

Faith feel thin, pressure thick

Heartbreak piled up brick by brick

Every song a flare in the dark

This ain’t music, these are scars

Cried for help in every verse

Screamin’ loud but unheard

How much longer do I run this race?

How much stronger just to face the hurt?

⸻

Hold on—

If you hear this, I’m still breathin’

If I’m speakin’, I’m still fightin’

Maybe rest don’t mean disappearin’

Maybe rest means survivin’

I don’t need to win today

Just don’t let the dark decide

If I ask for help tonight

Promise you won’t let me hide

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Why can’t I let go?

Yeah, it’s killin’ me silently

But I’m here right now

That’s my proof against the negativity

Do I deserve love?

Maybe that’s the truth in me

I promised you I’d change

So tonight I’m choosin’ me

I still feel lonely inside my heart

Still feels like shards when it falls apart

But I’m still breathin’, still standin’ here

Destroy my demon — I ain’t disappearin’

⸻

Take a break, it’s okay

You don’t gotta fix it all today

Just stay