More Kids Than a Burning Orphanage

Verse 1
I used to think one or two would be plenty,
But my body said, “Honey, let’s make it twenty!”
My doctor just sighs when he sees me walk in,
He don’t even ask — just checks who’s kickin’ again.

Chorus
I’ve had more kids outta me, than a burning orphanage spree,
Line ‘em up, tag their shirts, yeah, they all came free!
The neighbors stop countin’ when they hit twenty-three,
I’ve birthed more kids outta me, than a burning orphanage, yee-hee!

Verse 2
The school bus driver just waves me off,
Says, “Lady, I’ll need three buses just to drop ‘em all off!”
The PTA made me my own parking lane,
And the hospital wing’s got my family name.

Chorus
I’ve had more kids outta me, than a burning orphanage spree,
Like a Pez dispenser poppin’ — they keep comin’ from me!
Diapers stacked higher than the Christmas tree,
I’ve birthed more kids outta me, than a burning orphanage, yee-hee!

Bridge
If babies were trophies, I’d need a whole shelf,
I’m running a daycare — all staffed by myself.
Heard the stork’s in therapy, cryin’ on cue,
He said, “Lady, I’m tired! No more trips for you!”

Final Chorus
I’ve had more kids outta me, than a burning orphanage spree,
Even Santa’s like, “Dang, that’s too many for me!”
If life is a circus, then I’m the marquee,
I’ve birthed more kids outta me, than a burning orphanage — yee-hee!

Upbeat country-comedy style, like something you’d hear at a honky-tonk with a banjo in the back, female, live