High for the night

Hook

I been mixin’ my pain with chemicals

Tryna feel normal, that shit never works

High for the night, then it get unbearable

Love feel fake, but the pills still flirt

I been drownin’ my thoughts in medical

Doctor said slow down, I sped it up first

Heart too loud, so I numb it with Percs

Smile for the world while my soul still hurts

Verse 1

Yeah, I wake up sick, need somethin’ to feel

Coffee and a pill just to make shit real

Everybody say, “Bro, just heal,”

But they ain’t never had demons knockin’ on the wheel

I don’t chase highs, I escape lows

Same vice, different nights, same clothes

I tried love, that shit came with a halo

Then it fell off fast, now my heart got holes

I don’t do drugs to be cool, I do drugs to cope

There’s a difference, but they don’t fuckin’ know

If I’m sober too long, my mind get close

To a dark-ass place I don’t like to go

Hook

I been mixin’ my pain with chemicals

Tryna feel normal, that shit never works

High for the night, then it get unbearable

Love feel fake, but the pills still flirt

I been drownin’ my thoughts in medical

Doctor said slow down, I sped it up first

Heart too loud, so I numb it with Percs

Smile for the world while my soul still hurts

Verse 2

I been poppin’ my feelings, not just prescriptions

Every memory sharp, every thought intrusive

I loved that girl like it was religion

She left me alone with my bad decisions

Now it’s late nights, bad habits

Bottle half empty, brain full static

I tell myself, “Bro, you got this,”

Then I relapse mentally, fuckin’ panic

I ain’t proud of the shit I been leanin’ on

But it keep me alive when I’m feelin’ gone

Everybody want peace, I just want it calm

Just one quiet night where my head don’t scream

Bridge

I don’t wanna die, I just don’t wanna feel

There’s a difference they don’t ever hear

If I overdose, don’t call me weak

I been fightin’ wars in my fuckin’ sleep

Verse 3

I tried clean livin’, it felt fake

Like raw emotions too sharp to take

So I roll one up, let my heart sedate

Tell myself I’ll quit on a better day

They say I’m lost, maybe that’s true

But I still show up, still push through

If this pain the cost of seein’ truth

Then fuck it, I’ll pay it—what else to do?

Hook / Outro

I been mixin’ my pain with chemicals

Tryna feel normal, that shit never works

High for the night, then it get unbearable

Still chase love even though it hurts

If I crash one day, just know this first:

I tried my best in a fucked-up world

This ain’t glorification, this a cry for help

Wrapped in a beat, poured out in words