Why me pt.2

Yeah…

I don’t even know who I’m talkin’ to anymore…

God… myself… or the ghosts that won’t leave me alone.

Why me?

⸻

Why me… why am I still alive?

While they’re buried in the dirt, I’m here askin’ the sky

Every night I close my eyes, but I don’t find sleep

Just a million questions in my chest so deep

Why me… why not take me instead?

Why my people in a coffin while I’m breathin’ this air?

Carryin’ they names like a stone on my back

Tryna move forward but it always drags me back

⸻

I still see your faces in the mirror when it fogs

I still hear your voices when I’m talkin’ to God

I still drive past places where we used to hang out

Now it’s flowers on the corner, candles burned out

And I’m stuck here wonderin’ if I did enough

Could I have saved you? Or was life just too rough?

Why am I chosen? Or am I cursed instead?

To be alive with the memories, while you lay dead

It ain’t fair, I ain’t special, I ain’t strong, I ain’t brave

I’m just lost in this maze, draggin’ grief to the grave

And I smile for the world, but I’m dyin’ inside

With a storm in my chest that I’m tryin’ to hide

⸻

Why me… why am I still alive?

While they’re buried in the dirt, I’m here askin’ the sky

Every night I close my eyes, but I don’t find sleep

Just a million questions in my chest so deep

Why me… why not take me instead?

Why my people in a coffin while I’m breathin’ this air?

Carryin’ they names like a stone on my back

Tryna move forward but it always drags me back

⸻

Sometimes I think maybe I lived just to suffer

Maybe my punishment’s watchin’ every friend turn to a number

Etched in a stone, a name with two dates

And I’m left with survivor’s guilt I can’t shake

I should be with you, laughin’, growin’, and livin’

Not cryin’ in the dark, beggin’ God for a vision

But He’s silent… and I’m stuck with this ache in my chest

Like I’m waitin’ for a reason that never manifests

So I write these words like I’m bleedin’ on the page

Hopin’ pain turns to purpose when it’s locked in a cage

Maybe I’m here to keep your story alive

To speak your names through the verses when I rhyme

⸻

If I could trade my tomorrow for your yesterday

I would lay in that dirt, and let you walk away

But I can’t… so I’m haunted till the day I fall

Livin’ for you all, even if it kills me all.

⸻

Why me… why am I still alive?

While they’re buried in the dirt, I’m here askin’ the sky

Every night I close my eyes, but I don’t find sleep

Just a million questions in my chest so deep

Why me… maybe someday I’ll know

Till then I’ll carry your names everywhere I go

Every rhyme, every breath, every word I speak

I live for the fallen, even though it breaks me.

⸻

Yeah…

Why me…

Guess I’ll never know…