Scared of Falling

Oh no, oh no, oh no

I’m tired…

So tired of falling

⸻

My passion died, I can’t lie, I been runnin’ on empty

Feel alone and paranoid like the world tryna get me

Phone on silent, I disappear when it’s heavy

Love being alone when I’m low so nobody can stress me

Still tryna accept all the people that left me

Guess some chapters had an ending, never meant to protect me

Act like I’m fine, but my eyes say I’m pretending

Lonely soul, nobody knows how this feeling can wreck me

Born to be broken, maybe that’s why I’m open

Spill my pain into these songs so nobody feels hopeless

Under-appreciated, emotions unspoken

I been running for so long, forgot what I was chasin’

Ran up that hill tryna bargain with God

Then I realized I already got all that I got

Vision blurry but I’m learning to see through the fog

There’s beauty in the ugly, pain leaves beautiful scars

⸻

I don’t wanna feel

Don’t wanna feel this way

I said I’d escape

But I’m stuck in the same place

⸻

I just wanna feel alive

Even if it hurts sometimes

I’m scared of falling in love

Scared of falling every time

I just wanna feel okay

Without numbing all the pain

I’m scared of falling in love

But I’m more scared of feeling nothing

⸻

Heart full of hatred, energy faded

Either I’m tired or anxious, my mind complicates it

Same day, same pain, different conversations

All this talk with myself, man, it don’t help

Broken wings got me falling, can’t take flight

Mama called, she don’t know her son ain’t right

I’m balling — not the money, just crying at night

Stalling, telling myself that one day I’ll be fine

I stare at the ceiling, arguing with my thoughts

Just wanna feel alive, not stuck in a box

I think I need somebody, yeah I’ll say it out loud

‘Cause disappearing quietly ain’t helping me now

⸻

She saw beauty in my darkness

I saw darkness in her smile

We held our feelings hostage

Afraid to stay a while

I drown it out on weekends

Wake up feeling vacant

Searching for a feeling

That the drugs can’t keep replacing

But maybe love ain’t the enemy

Maybe fear is just loud

Maybe falling isn’t failing

Maybe I just forgot how

⸻

I just wanna feel alive

Even if I cry sometimes

I’m scared of falling in love

But I still wanna try

I just wanna feel okay

Without running every day

I’m scared of falling in love

But I don’t wanna fade away

⸻

Oh no, oh no, oh no

I’m tired… but I’m still here

Still breathing