Moderational Drugs

I wanna admit something that's hard to admit

Cos people think that anyone associated with it

Are all the same playing the game & should hang their heads down in shame

But I wanna speak on behalf of the few

People it helps cos it could help you too

Feel better

Get up & out of bed

Cos without this bad thing

I'm constantly stuck in my head

I dont use it to escape

I use it to face

My demons inside

That cause pain & make me wanna hide

I wouldve given anything

Thats why I did the 1 thing

That others frown upon

Turned out it was the one thing that helped me a tonne

& even though it's hard

To admit & let down my guard

I have to share

Incase it helps others out there

How?, well

Because I suffered so much hell

My mental health

Had fooled my mind

Into thinking Im the broken kind

My body would shutdown

Id just sleep & never get out of my night gown

Soo sleepy & weepy

An emotional heapy

I had no energy

Left to try & work on me

I wouldve done anything

To finally

Pain in silence every day

Listening to the hurtful shit others say

Like "oh she's just faking, she's actually fine

She exaggerates, a hypochondriac does it all the time"

"She's just lazy, it's just manipulation

So she gets what she wants in every situation,

& that's how she gets away with it all

Don't be a fool! don't fall!"

It makes me really sad

That people think I'd be that bad

To pretend to be sick

& miss out on life just to play this trick

Where I stay in bed & cry & cry Cos I can't do anything else but lie

Here & wish I was dead

[Sarcastic] But Nooo it's just

All in my head

Just like everything out there

In moderation taken with care

Certain things can be helpful for some

Just like sugar & alcohol can become

Things that people over take & abuse

Then need to be treated & made to lose

Their addictive habit cos it now hurts you

It's not beneficial anymore

To do that thing you did before

Like running too much & too hard core

Balance

temperance

It's what self control is for

Here's the thing

that gave me a break

From sinking

Into all the pain

This is what helped me make

The choice to start the healing

& look at the reasons why I was feeling

So sick & in so much pain so hidden & unseen

It's scary to say but I gotta say

That it was

-- methamphetamine

Those who turn into a crack head

Usually stay awake too long & don't go to bed

They starve their bodies from food & drink

It's not actually the drug it's not what you think

They'll be using to run from their shit

But really it just heightens it

Turns them all paranoid

Makes them face what they're trying to avoid & thats why it could fully

be good

If only it was used the way that it should

It could fully help some people & I know it would

Cos it truly helped me feel understood

Finally

I found something that could