3am and the city’s a sinner, Neon bleeding through the blinds. Infront of the crowd, you are everything I crave, But alone with you, it’s venom in my mind. Your hand finds mine like a headline romance, Flashbulb love, all glitter and praise. But in the quiet, when the music dies, I taste the truth beneath your gaze. You told me your door is always open, Said if I need anything, you’d be there. But when I look into your hypnotic gaze, I know that accented tongue was telling lies somewhere in the air. You play to your audience while you lie to yourself, Standing tall like you’re heaven sent. I push you away, swear I don’t need your touch, Then I’m back where your shadow went. I call you poison, I call you sin, Say I’m stronger than the pull you give. But every time I try to quit, I’m underneath you again, trying not to live. You’re an unhealthy addiction I cannot give up, My sweetest relapse, my midnight rush. You perform like a saint in a spotlight glow, Silver tongue wrapped in charm. But behind closed doors your halo slips, And I fold right back in your arms. You taste like pride and broken vows, Like something I should refuse. I shove you back, say I’m done this time, Then I’m tangled in your truth. You whisper promises in low confession, Say I’m the only one who sees. But I’ve watched you rehearse your honesty, For every pair of desperate knees. You play to your audience while you lie to yourself, Applause ringing in your head. I walk away with shaking hands, Then crawl back to your bed. I say your name like it’s a curse, Like I’m trying to break the spell. But your voice hits slow at 3am, And I fall like I never fell. You’re an unhealthy addiction I cannot give up, My velvet vice, my silver cup. I hate the way you hold me close, Like you know I won’t escape. I hate the way I push you off, Just to beg you to stay. It’s a push and pull, a war in skin, My pride against your touch. I shove you out the front door hard, Then drag you back in by love. You play to your audience while you lie to yourself, But I’m the truth you can’t outrun. I swear I’m done, I swear I’m free, Then I’m right back where we begun. Under your hands, under your spell, Under the weight of what we are. I push you away like I mean goodbye, Then end up beneath you in the dark. 3am and I’m wide awake, Knowing you’re the habit I can’t break.

Unholy Habit