Gallon of tears (my suicidal note)

I sit alone the clock won't tick

My thoughts run deep my heart feels sick

The paper stares it knows my pain

Words pour out like a heavy rain

The mirror breaks it shows my soul

A thousand pieces I can't control

The pen it shakes but it still writes

A scream trapped in the dead of night

But in the dark I hear a sound

If I do it I be hell bound

A voice said hold on just one more day

The dawn might bring a brand new day

I fold the note and set it down

If words could talk but i don't hear a sound

Looking for hope looking for a glow

The fight looks over I think i better go

I'm writing these words I can't erase

Tears fall down and stain the page

In this silence I must decide

My suicidal note confides what's deep inside

Gallon of tears

I'm trapped inside my own head

Wrestling with words that need to be said

Shadows creeping where light once shed

Feeling like my souls already dead

Me myself and I in the empty night

Fighting battles but I lost the fight

Dreams fading fast like a nose diving kite

Darkness hugs me it's my only light

As I keep searching for a reason to stay

I try to have faith but the pain won't go away

Trying to hold on but this goes on everyday

Will someone catch me if I fall astray

Lost in my mind no way out

Silent screams but there's no way out

Try to stay afloat but I'm drowning in the doubt

Wondering to myself is this is what life's about

I'm writing these words I can't erase

Tears fall down and stain the page

In this silence I must decide

My suicidal note confides what's deep inside

Gallon of tears

Now I'm swimming deep in a sea of doubt

Shadows creeping I can't climb out

A thousand voices screaming in my head

Echoes of the words I wish I never said

I'm starring at the mirror but I don't see me

Just a stranger like my pops I'm in misery

Faking smiles yeah I wear that disguise

But you could see theough it if you look in my eyes

Every drops a story I can't erase

Memories linger they're taking up space

Trying to breathe but the weight is too strong

Every moment feels like I don't belong

Late night silence is my only friend

Wonder if this lonely road will ever end

Carrying this weight it's a heavy cost

But in this flood I'm scared to get lost

Gallon of tears

Gallon of tears feeling up my soul

Pouring like rain it's out of control

Drowning in the pain it's pulling me near

Sinking in the flood of this gallon of tears

I'm writing these words I can't erase

Tears fall down and stain the page

In this silence I must decide

My suicidal note confides what's deep inside

Gallon of tears