[Melodic Humming] [Verse 1] If I’m being honest, I’m scared of the quiet When nobody’s talking, my thoughts get violent I smile in public, but behind my eyelids There’s a million reasons I don’t feel invited I tell people I’m good, but that’s half a lie I’m just better at hiding what’s eating inside I got faith in my chest and fear in my head I don’t know which one’s gonna win in the end I pray for peace but I still overthink I’m asking for water while drowning in drinks Tryna numb out the feelings I don’t understand Tryna be someone stronger than I really am [Pre-Chorus] I don’t wanna be weak But I don’t wanna fake I don’t wanna fall apart But I’m tired of being brave [Chorus] If I’m being honest I don’t know who I am I’m not who I was But I’m not who I planned I’m stuck in the middle Of breaking and healed I’m smiling in pictures But hurting for real If I’m being honest I’m scared you’ll leave Once you see all the cracks Underneath the me I’m not looking for pity I just want truth If I’m being honest… I’m still learning you [Verse 2] I got love in my heart, got holes in my trust Every time someone’s close, I’m waiting for dust I don’t know if it’s trauma or just how I’m wired But I’m scared that being loved means I’ll get tired Tired of pretending I don’t need somebody Tired of acting like I’m built out of solid I wanna be held without feeling ashamed I wanna be real without being to blame I tell God I’m grateful, but I still feel empty Like blessings are there but they don’t really get me I don’t need a miracle, I just need a hand To remind me I’m more than a broken man [Pre-Chorus] I don’t wanna give up But I don’t wanna drown I don’t wanna lose myself Just tryna be found [Chorus] If I’m being honest I don’t know who I am I’m not who I was But I’m not who I planned I’m stuck in the middle Of losing and growth Trying to be brave But scared to be close If I’m being honest I need you to see That I’m not a hero I’m just trying to be Someone who’s healing Someone who’s true If I’m being honest… I still need you [Melodic Humming] [orchestra solo] [Bridge] Maybe I don’t need answers Maybe I just need time Maybe all of this chaos Means I’m still alive Maybe I’m not broken Maybe I’m just in between Who I used to be And who I’m meant to be [Final Chorus] If I’m being honest I’m afraid of the dark But I’m still walking forward With a light in my heart I don’t have it together But I’m trying my best And I’m tired of pretending That I don’t need rest If I’m being honest I don’t want to be numb I want to feel something Even if it hurts some I’m not looking for perfect Just something that’s true If I’m being honest… I’m still healing too