I know I messed up

Baby I don't even know what I'm talking about love
When I don't love myself 
I know I messed up 
And the words can't describe how sorry I am
Just Do you remember The times 
I'm Talking about the good old times and the bad times 
When we aren't fighting 
Me rubbing your face with my hands
Kissing you for hours 
Looking into your eyes feeling the fear sink in
So in love every moment felt like a dream 
I knew we weren't perfect... 
But you just had to fuck everything up
What are we doing talking about love 
our future’s crushed 
So I'm sorry 
I’ve been lying for too long
To everyone in my life
Saying I’m okay,
Smiling while I break inside
I can barely sleep
Trauma messing with my head
And the pain in my chest won't let me be
Breaking my own heart every dam time try to love again 
What am I talking about love
When I don't even love myself 
trying to move forward 
But it harder when you the only thing I think about 
I’m so sorry I let the fear of losing you overnight control me
Looking into your eyes...
I found a part of myself
I thought I lost 
That I'm glad I found 
But it too late our future’s crushed 
All because I was a coward 
To afraid to lose myself again after the bad times 
The regrets kills me every dam time I think about
Your smile 
I just want to hold you 
Intel the sunsets on our faces
Hoping I could love you again 
But I know I won't get that chance 
I'm sorry I knew I mess everything up
looking back I was a fool to let you go
All my struggles was because of Me
The blame became to much but I have to let go
I know that now
Please don't leave me 
I was a coward to give up
I know 
I kept running from things I shouldn't 
it still have a hold on me
Even when I tell myself it doesn't 
But the past hunts me every dam time 
As I'm trying to forget about all the bad times
And think about the good times if they are any
I know our dreams are crushed 
And it all my fault 
All because I was to afraid to lose you 
I just ended up fucking everything up
I wish I was perfect for you baby
 but i know I'm not
And it all my fault 
I know that now
I just hope it not to late 
Just let me love you again 

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