The smallest spark

there’s a fire in my eyes

but I’m not sure if it burns the same

the fading light

with every day

I remember my hopes like an impossible prize

my dreams and aspirations that I can no longer claim

they seem so distant now and just out of sight

I used to be so ambitious

but now I feel lonely

and far too empty

all I can hear are my helpless cries

almost vicious

all that fills me now is what drains me

like a fading shadow during sundown

a lost wish

a shattered dream

a broken promise

a faded photo worn beyond repair

no longer wanted

no longer needed

a fragile ghost

I keep the silence weighing in my chest

my voice is hollow

i yearn for guidance soft and true

a gentle whisper to lead my way through

I feel as though

no one understands

I’m afraid of how they’ll judge

my stomach churns

my mind never stops thinking

of every mistake I’ve ever made

on constant replay like a broken record

sharp, piercing through my soul that burns

of all the thoughts I have no one will ever know

hope and disappointment

love and hate

such a fine line

what’s behind haunts me

a terrifying echo of

memories I can’t out run

and what is ahead scares me

of what I might become

a dark and deep secret

waters untouchable

the present is like a surprise gone wrong

A throbbing tide with overwhelming waves

inside I feel so turbulent

like thunder and lightning

but on the outside I lie to seem alright

a smile always on my lips

my spirit neeeds an adjustment

my only desire

is to be calm

inside the fire

is slowly dying

flickering

It isn’t dead

but it’s barely living

is it true all clouds have a silver lining?

I still wake up

everyday with the smallest spark

enough to reignite a blazing fire

despite my fear

there is still a light in the dark

i wake up and think of the blessings I have

deep down a glimmer of hope lives In my soul

everyday my mind and heart are doomed for war

my brain wants to protect

my heart wants to love

logic and impulse

it makes me laugh

strength can only come with pain

wisdom with suffering of all I’ve known

love with courage where the spirit dwells

I know it was never going to be easy

but my tears are like hot salty rain

my tears fall too fast

resembling lost hope with every one

I don’t want to lose myself to

temporary pleasure

nothing comes without a consequence

my soul must continue on

my heart and mind will learn to work together

before I lose myself

in everything

my fire

my hope

all my dreams and desires