Died With a Pen in My Hand

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I was just a boy, barely beard on my face

With a pen in my hand, writing down my own fate

The ink was black like a sky ‘fore the storm

And every damn line was a tower I formed

They took you from me, no reason, no word

Cold empty room… and you just disappeared

I screamed out to God, but He stayed like the grave

And everything I was… just faded away

And this pain deep down in my chest

Keeps on eating me alive, never letting me rest

From second to second it gets heavy as lead

I’m still breathing… but inside I’m dead

I used to laugh, had a fire in my eyes

Now I just stare at these broken inside lines

The roads stretch long and the whiskey runs warm

But nothing can shelter me from this storm

I wanna scream from the pain, but I stay still

My lungs full of fire, but no sound breaks the will

Not a single note… just a tear through my chest

And the silence screams louder than the rest

And this pain deep down in my chest

Keeps on eating me alive, never letting me rest

From second to second it gets heavy as lead

I’m still breathing… but inside I’m dead

They say time heals…

That’s a goddamn lie.

Time just cuts deeper…

like a rusted blade twisting inside.

Your name hangs low in the smoke of my nights

Like a curse watching over every hour of my life

I talk to the wind like you’re still right here

But all that remains… is an echo, my dear

The pen’s still lying where I fell apart

On the last dam-n line that I wrote in the dark

I tried giving you life… but gave you this pain

Now only guilt’s beating in my veins

And this pain deep down in my chest

Has already devoured what little was left

From second to second I fade out of me

A walking body… with nothing to be

I tried to scream…

but I stayed quiet like the grave

Died with a pen in my hand…

and everything I couldn’t save

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