Screaming Inside

Verse 1
You said we’d talk, I wait all day
Your name lights up, I know you’re there
A fleeting “hey,” if I’m lucky, rare
I tell myself it’s fine, pretend I don't care
But my chest is heavy, I can’t deny
I’m holding my breath, just to get by

You send me a line, then disappear
I see you online, but you’re never here
And I’m stuck alone, drowning in fear
I know it’s childish, I know it’s wrong
But I’ve been seething for far too long

Pre-Chorus
You say we’ll talk, but it’s never enough
A handful of minutes—I crave your voice 
I try to stay calm, try to breathe
Still, I’m stuck waiting for a sign

Chorus
I wanna scream, I wanna shout
I’m not stupid, don’t shut me out
I’m not pretend, I’m not a joke
Why do I feel so damn disposable?
I hate this silence, it’s cutting through
I care too much, it’s wrecking my life
Tear this screen, let it all out
I’m not childish, I’m not a fool
But I can’t stop missing you
Why do I feel so damn invisible?

Verse 2
Every “I’m fine” I send’s a lie
Boiling over, I can’t deny
Minutes a day, if I get that
While you scroll away, I’m full of unrest

You’re out of reach, with your friends
But your status shows the time you spend
So I stay quiet, afraid to break
Hoping somehow you’ll feel my ache

Pre-Chorus
I’m not pretending, I’m not your game
I bite my tongue, but I’m not to blame
My heart’s on fire, my mind won’t leave
This screaming silence beats in my chest
Why do I feel so damn small, so damn unseen?

Chorus
I wanna scream, I wanna shout
I’m not stupid, don’t shut me out
I’m not pretend, I’m not a joke
Why do I feel so damn disposable?
I hate this silence, it’s cutting through
I care too much, it’s wrecking my life
Tear this screen, let it all out
I’m not childish, I’m not a fool
But I can’t stop missing you
Why do I feel so damn invisible?

Bridge
I scream inside, but it won’t reach you
Rant and shout, nothing breaks through
I see your space, I see your life
Still, I’m aching for just a sign tonight
I’m sick of hurting, I’m sick of this fight
I know it’s messy, I know the cost
But I can’t control the way I feel 

Chorus
I wanna scream, I wanna shout
I’m not stupid, don’t shut me out
I’m not pretend, I’m not a joke
Why do I feel so damn disposable?
I seethe in silence, it eats me alive
I care too much, it poisons my mind
Tear this screen, let it all out
I’m not childish, I’m not a fool
But I can’t stop missing you
Why do I feel so damn invisible?

Outro
All the words I need, I can’t send
Seething inside, alone again
A quiet ache I can’t defend
Staring at the screen, alone in my room
Wishing you’d notice, wishing you’d write 
Just a few words, just some time
Instead of leaving me here, losing my mind

female alternative rock/emo electro pop/edm