Gaslight

Your twisting me,
Turning all my trust into disbelief,
Zapping all my positive energy,
Leaving me fighting for a moment of relief,
A way to try and find a real kind of peace,
I’m waiting for your much requested honesty,
But all you see,
Is a lie that you need me to believe. 
I don’t trust myself anymore. 
When I speak up I’m silenced, then ignored. 
I’ve never been what you need, always wanting more. 
Accepting the mental gymnastics is harder than before. 
Who am I doing this for?
Your twisting me,
Turning all my trust into disbelief,
Zapping all of my positive energy,
Leaving me fighting for a moment of relief,
A way to try and find a moment of real peace. 
I’m waiting for your much requested honesty,
But all you see,
Is a lie that you need me to believe. 
Am I crazy?
Is it that easy to manipulate me?
Every time I speak up, it turns into a fight,
I try to separate the lies from what is truly right. 
But you bend my mind so quickly and you know how to gaslight. 
You take away my power and my freedom to decide,
You make me change my mind,
Then ask me if I am alright!?
Your twisting me,
Turning all my trust into disbelief,
Zapping all of my positive energy,
Until I’m this worthless thing,
Without a brain,
Desperately searching for a moment of relief,
Someone to tell me that I’m not really crazy,
Someone to free me from this world where I am insane,
Cos I’m not insane,
I’m just the one you like to blame,
When things don’t go your way. 
But I’m no longer waiting for your false pretence of honesty,
I’m not here to be your scapegoat or an emotionless machine,
But damn you, I will be seen!
I’m not your victim, of that you can believe. 

Female voice. Powerful